The ROFL Times
Online Gaming's First Newspaper
Established 1994 On Sierra's INN/ImagInation Network
by Lugh and NightOwl playing over Long Distance Phone Lines.

The BOOK STORE
Ultima Online Atlantic Shard: The BOOK STORE,

DeadBob and Lady  Tang, Props.

 Open Daily in the Same Spot Since 2003.
Your One- Stop  Shop for Marked Runes.
 
Check the Mail Box on our steps for the very latest  runes and game information.
 The Atlantic player's trusted source for the latest runes.
A small library of currently useful runes makes it easy to find the rune you are looking for.
The Perilous Inquirer
UO Siege Perilous' Most Read Weekly Newspaper!
Read the Perilous Inquirer on UO.Stratics.com
The Phoenix Diary©
A novel about you, me and the secrets of the universe!
ThePhoenixDiary.com
Book Store
"Remember Folks, at the Book Store, we cheat the Other guy and pass the Savings on to You!"  -DeadBob
HEALTH WARNING
 
The Ter Mur Surgeon General has determined that the current craze of breast feeding pigeons in the Queen’s Park is hazardous to your health.

UO GMs NOT CANNIBALS SAYS UO

 UO spokesperson Woot Woot Barney today denounced as “mere speculation” reports that GMs lured players into a Tokuno wooded area for an Iron Chef Competition.
 “They were the chefs,” Diablo accuses, “And we were the ingredients.”
This reporter stared at the veteran player, as he leaned noticeably to the left in the saddle.
 ”What happened?” I asked.
 “It was horrible. Some of us followed runes marked ‘Good Food’ to a woods. We were jumped by GMs wearing chef’s hats & carrying cleavers. They slaughtered several people I knew and popped them into open ovens. Then they danced around adding spices and chanting, ‘Kick-it-up-a-notch.’ They chased me,” Diablo said, “Yelling, ‘Get that one! He’s already half baked.’”
 The big man shifted uncomfortably in his saddle, leaned left again and fixed me with his steely eyes. “I can show you proof,” he said. Diablo looked around carefully. Then he dismounted and mooned me. OMG! His left buttock is missing!
 “They almost got me,” he said. “It was real close, I tell you.”
 But UO spokesperson Woot Woot, even when confronted with this eye witness testimony, dismissed it derisively, saying only, “Well, that evidence is half-arsed, ain’t it?”

NO HELL EITHER FOR HEAVENLESS
 Heavenless [FSP!] [SL] has received notification from Hell that he’s not welcome there, either.
 “Maybe Limbo will take me,” the scarred fighter told this reporter. “You don’t think I’ll havta learn that stupid dance, do you?”
Red MaskThe Phoenix Diary
Genetic memories emerge in three teens as they search the postmodern American West for an ancient diary.


 A man from the past ruthlessly pursues Otero, Rhia and Marc through the ruins of Denver to the Rocky Mountains and into an Ancient Vault because he knows the Phoenix Diary is everything they suspect it is and more powerful than they can imagine.

 Many legends surround the Phoenix Diary. Is it a highly powerful computer containing the data needed to rebuild Earth's lost civilization? An almanac for restoring it to the Garden of Eden? Or, is the Phoenix Diary an ancient tome written by a man from the stars telling of mankind’s true beginning and ultimate destiny? "None of that is true, of course," Otero's father tells him. "People just need stories like that to remind them of what they can achieve."

 But the man from the past knows The Phoenix Diary foretells the future of human evolution.

Written by GD Deckard
Cover by Rachel Cowen


New: Bob vs The Aliens
Serialized on WritersCo-op.com
See the blog, Writing DaysZ